❀ A time to weep...

Driving down the hill in the night, thousands of lights shine in the darkness, homes... families... souls... I weep...
Our God wept too...

Driving thru the city, people on the sidewalks, crowds crossing at the light, mothers and children... I weep...
Our God wept too...

Walking in the store, voices around me, babies crying, mothers scolding, fathers shouting, stress... I weep...
Our God wept too...

America the beautiful, America the great, America land of the free, America in the balance... I weep...
For our Nation, for our children, for our young people, for our families, for our seniors, for our churches... I weep...

Jesus, what do you see?
It is not Your will that any should suffer - be hungry - be lonely and cold... You weep...

Wake up Church! Rise up to the challenge! Get under the burden! Can you feel the Lord's heartbeat? It's almost midnight, darkness is falling! Let your light shine high and bright! And weep... for the children... the old man was once a child... the old woman was a baby... And God's plan was good... Heavenly Father... I weep.

❀ Circuit breaker check

When the outlet for the fan didn't work, we plugged it somewhere else.
When the washer didn't come on, we used the next outlet.
When the dryer didn't respond and the cord was too short for the next outlet, we used a power strip to reach it and Voilà!
When the heater's blower didn't turn on, we used the portable heater. It's not really cold, only in the early morning, so it will do.

The neighbor came to check the circuit breaker box. We had been fiddling with it, resetting it here and there. Now it is of no avail. Sounds like the main fuse box - whatever that is. It needs serious fixing by a professional before we loose all power!

Isn't it what we do sometimes?
Go around instead of dealing with the problem?
Make do with what ever instead of getting the real thing?

When something is wrong with the main fuse box, we can try to plug in, but there is no power.
When something is wrong with the main fuse box, there is One who specializes in internal problems. He's got x-ray vision and know exactly what, where and how.

I need to plug into a "live" outlet!
I need you Jesus to check my fuses!
I need that Power, fresh everyday!

"...the inward man is renewed day by day." 2 Cor. 4:16 KJV

❀ Pieces of my heart

Over the years, trials and disappointments came my way. It seemed that my dreams were only that - dreams. My hopes were almost shattered. Goals looked impossible to attain.
Thru God's Grace I remained.

At times my heart was so broken, I felt like as if I was dying inside. Jesus didn't leave me there. He picked me up and carried me, then He helped me grow. Thru God's Grace I remained.

Tears are a language God understand - I speak it. My heart is broken, but thru God's Grace I shall remain.

He has not brought me this far to leave me now. There is a purpose and a deep calling in my soul. So be it, let my heart be broken.

In the breaking I can get a glimpse of His sufferings. The Alabaster Box was broken for the precious ointment to be released. Have thine own way my Lord. Do as You please. For who am I to know the way that I should go? "Your Word is a Lamp Unto my Feet and a Light Unto my Path" (Psalm 119:105 KJV).

"The breaking is not over" - this was spoken to my in the Holy Ghost by my Pastor. It was only the beginning.
"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise" (Psalm 51:17 KJV).

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In the state of brokenness I hunger for the Arms of God - He gives me strength - He loves me - He cares for me.
Now I can go on and remain - in His love.

❀ Confidence

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ "I am the Lord that healeth thee." Ex 15:26 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

This Scripture is a sure foundation. He can, He wants to, He will take care of me! When I came out of Egypt, God gave me His Word!
But there was a requirement at the beginning of the same verse- "If thou wilt diligently hearken to the voice of the Lord thy God, and wilt do that which is right in his sight..."

Chapter 16 tells us what happened when His children decided to do "their own thing". I don't know what's best for me, but He does! "... How long refuse ye to keep my commandments and my laws?" EX 16:28

I've made a lot of mistakes along the way. But Calvary is a familiar place. I have confidence, not in me, but in God, in the Blood of Jesus, in the Holy Bible.

❀ Speak to me Lord...

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"... the Lord was not in the wind... the Lord was not in the earthquake... the Lord was not in the fire... " 1 Kings 19:11-12 KJV
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Monday morning was an amazing morning. It was one of those times when hands are busy with the mundane tasks of house keeping, washing, wiping, straightening. And just like that - God.
It happened at the bathroom sink. I looked up and saw my face with rivers pouring from my eyes as I heard my voice say " I won't pull back". I cannot explain in words exactly what happened, but I know it was the Spirit of the Lord speaking to my soul. Something happened. I changed. A door opened and I went thru it. I will not be afraid, I will not pull back. I did before... almost 10 years ago. Not this time. Oh, I know it won't be easy. But Jesus will be with me - that's all I need to know.
It's a funny thing, I was going over a mental list of "must haves" if I should go without all that I have right now. The list was actually quite short and it surprised me. That's when I felt the Potter's Hand.
I took my time with the Lord. He let me. Me and Jesus.

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"Lead me Lord! I'll follow, anywhere You open up the door
Let me know your wisdom, show me things I've never seen before
Lord I want to be Your witness, You can take what's wrong and make it right
Daystar shine down on me, let Your love shine thru me in the night.

Lord I see a world that's dying, wounded by the Master of deceit
Groping in the darkness, haunted by the years of past defeat
Then I see you standing near Lord, shining with compassion in Your eyes
Jesus, shine down on me, let Your love shine through me in the night."

❀ Sweet scent

Ahhh! The smell of freshly mowed grass! I don't know about you, but I love it.

It brings me back to my tender childhood years in Switzerland. My mother's parents and everyone in the family had yards, gardens, lawns - some lived right next to parks, school grounds and what-have-you. In those days everything was well kept and trash free. Push lawnmowers and fresh cut grass were part of our summer days. In the effervescence of the post-war days, life was at its best because we survived and it was over.

I was watching my grandson work the machine, keeping a bottle of water handy for him. It was hot, the small lawn slightly uphill - hard work for a young boy. Memories flooded my mind but instantaneously my thoughts were on the condition of my heart. It must stay clean and "freshly mowed" for my spirit to be right and a sweet savor to rise up in worship.

Sometimes an overgrown lawn has to be cut so short that it looks brown and half dead. But it'll come back with enough water. Why is it that we are reluctant to be trimmed way down by the Master? He knows not to cut too low and kill us! The Living Water will flow and lush growth will occur!

I think that God loves the smell of freshly mowed grass...

❀ First word...

This picture was taken Mother's Day 2007. These boys and girls have grown much in stature. Much has happened in their lives also. Too old for their years.
(The handsome little fellow on the left is Sister Philana's son Anthony)

When a little one is just babbling away, we wait for the first clear word. Sometimes it's "mama", sometimes it's "papa".
Is there anything sweeter that the first time it falls upon our ears? Our hearts are so full and nearly bursting at that moment, the whole world's got to know! Well, at least the whole family!

Do you know that God loves to hear babbling? I cannot begin to imagine how much He anticipates the first clear words of a new babe... Abba Father...

I've had this written down for several weeks now, just didn't post it. But as the Preacher preached on Sunday morning and children went to the altar, I remembered the draft.